Send Sleep Help!

Our three and a half year old daughter was a phenomenal sleeper. From day one, she slept through the night. The only times she would wake up during the night were if she was sick. But something changed this past 4th of July. That's right...8 months ago. We've now been dealing with anywhere from 1-5 (sometimes more) wake ups a night, along with early risings (like between 4:30-5:30 AM). She's three. She'll be four in September.

I am convinced her sleep struggles are mainly due to taking naps. During the week, she is required to lay down at daycare. The room is black as night, so of course she'll fall asleep. We've asked if she can just sit and do something quietly, but it's simply too dark to do anything. So even though they aren't "required" to sleep, she's going to fall asleep due to the environment. On weekends or days when there isn't school, we don't make her take a nap. Instead, we color, do puzzles, play card games, etc. We have better nights those nights. She usually still gets up early, but at least she isn't waking up as often during the nights.

I hoped the recent time change would help the early wakings a little bit. I was wrong. If anything, it's been our worst week in a very long time. The past three nights she's been up six times every night and up no later than 5:15 AM. 

We have tried so many different things!

• Hatch: Currently set to purple at bed time and yellow at wake up. We've tried a variety of colors and have not noticed a difference.
• Switching her to going to bed after brother. She does seem to enjoy the one-on-one time reading for 20-25 minutes.
• Water: We've tried to limit water intake after supper. She wakes up with the fullest pull up, so I questioned if she was waking up because she had to go to the bathroom? I always ask if she needs to go when she's up and it's usually "no". 
• Routine: We have a bedtime routine and follow it daily. 6:45 PM the Alexa starts playing "sleepy" music. 7 PM alarm goes off to start cleaning up toys. Brush teeth with brother. Change brother, get her PJ's on while brother is changing, read to brother, pray with brother. Go in her room. Read for 20-25 minutes. Try to go potty. Pray. Bed.
• One Zarbee's Children's Chewable Melatonin on occasion. There's never been a difference when she takes it. 

Once it's time to actually get in bed, that's when the chaos starts. If we are not standing by her door, she comes running out repeatedly. I always walk her back and say the same thing, "Good night. I love you. You can sing or pray. Please stay in bed." Then the process repeats. If she's very tired, we maybe have to stand by the door for 1-2 minutes and she'll be fine. I must admit...we've come a LONG ways in this area. I used to have to lay right next to her until she fell asleep. Now I just stand by the door, so I consider that a big win. 

When she wakes up at night, she comes in to our room. 95% of the time my husband doesn't hear her, so I'm usually the one going in and out all night long. I always bring her right back to her room (there was a time we just let her sleep in our bed...but that didn't really work because she would wake up when I got up at 4:15 to workout or when my husband got up for work at 5).

In the morning, I get up at 4:15 AM to workout. That way, I'm done by when my husband gets up at 5. He is out of the house by 5:15 AM. I'm in the shower and then she usually comes in the bathroom. I do feel that if I were not up, she would go back to sleep. But I'm up and she simply will not go back to sleep. My only positive is she's usually very happy when she gets up. She does not seem tired at all. On weekends, she sleeps until around 6 AM.

I feel we've tried everything under the sun. Some people have been so supportive and offering advice, while others bash everything we've tried. Two things we will not do...let her sleep in bed with us every night (don't get me wrong...we certainly didn't mind it. It's simply due to the fact that when we get up and get ready, she's in our room and hears us and that's way too early). And two, I will not hold her door shut so she's forced to stay in her room. Yes, this was a suggestion. Along with just letting her scream and cry. That's off the table because then she wakes brother up. 

Some have questioned if she's sleepwalking. I truly don't think so. When she comes in our room she is usually saying, "Mom", "Mom" or saying something else trying to get my attention. I guess she could be sleep walking and sleep talking, but I doubt it. 

Along with the lack of sleep, has come more continuous poor behavior choices. When she doesn't sleep well, she has rough days at daycare with pinching, scratching, biting, etc. These seem to be more frequent lately. 

I'm at a loss of what to do or try. And I'm tired. I find myself becoming more and more frustrated with her every single night. I would rather do the newborn phase than this! It was 10x easier 😂. Maybe it's supposed to be like this with three year olds? For months on end? 

If you've had similar experiences or have any ideas, I'd love to hear them!